If I Can Be Serious For A Minute

I apologize for this being later than I like it to be. Due to weather, Internet issues and our chest freezer coughing out its last bit of coldness, it’s been a long couple days.

Due to it raining slush puppies for almost 48 hours, I didn’t have any Internet at all for most of Friday. Luckily the antenna on the roof was pointed in the right direction or I wouldn’t be able to see SD at all. The thing is that because I don’t have the DD to keep me busy during the show, I’m over-analyzing the show in a way I rarely do, so this Rendezvous is going to be a lot snarkier than normal. Please let me know if you like this side of me, or think it’s better to have me a bit distracted so you get some of the snark in the DD. That being said, I miss hanging out with everyone and feel a bit lonely watching SD mostly by myself.

Yes, I admit it, I LOVES Me Some Lance Storm! I was giddy to hear he was returning backstage and was hoping we’d see more of the bald man than most of the other former superstars who work back there. I’ve been swooning over Storm since WCW, and even enjoy some of his ECW matches. He’s one of the smartest men in the industry and I love how he pushes kids to read and stay in school. He’s a true role-model and yet so easily mocked. While he didn’t seem that way much of the time in the ring, he really seems to not take himself too seriously and has produced some great wrestlers from his school. He could really help some of today’s superstars get over and improve their careers. Storm (James too, Toni is getting there, but mostly Lance) will always hold a special place in my heart.

Each and every time I see the horrible overhead graphics on SD, I cannot unsee what The Scouse Taxman wrote in his article about WWE Stocks. I never liked the graphics, but he hit the nail on the head about them being a drain and not at all needed.

 

Richard Prior Level Comedy!

 

 

I will fully admit I was in the loo when SD started, and when I heard JoMo’s music I bellowed to Stacy, “Is it bad that I’m already over JoMo?” He answered, “Probably.” The sad thing is that I really want to be on the JoMo train, but I’m not feeling it. I know, I’m cranky about superstars returning, I know that, but certain guys have impressed me – Christian, R-Truth, McIntyre. I was thrilled with the Hardy Boyz returning, at least briefly. That being said, I think Miz’s shirt would look better on me than it does on him. It’s too much cowl for any many to wear when it’s not a costume. JoMo, on the other hand, looked amazing out there with his messy man-bun (which I’m pushing Sam to try as I know he’d so rock) and shirtless under that red tux jacket.

New Day was great here, as always. The Usos also killed it, as they always do, and I’ll continue to say I love their shorter hair. They’re maturing and showing it in their looks. Not every wrestler needs long hair, even if it does make it easier to call moves from under. Sorry, watching Ricochet and Lashley trying to call moves in the ring with no hair to cover either just makes it look silly in HD.

Lastly, I love Richard Prior movies. I think Brewster’s Millions is my fave, though there will be few comedy teams that are better than Prior and Wilder were together.

 

Ziggy’s Hair Penitentiary

 

 

Cole calling Ziggler ‘possibly the best in the business’ is an insult to most of the NXT roster and more than half on the Raw and SD rosters. He could have been a top guy in WWE if WWE hadn’t screwed him on every turn. I’m not even going to touch that mass of hay on his head that he feels the need to straighten to beyond an inch of what it used to be.

Jey’s crawl across the mat, giving Roode the time to stop him was a bit too overly dramatic for my taste. I love pro wrestling drama, until it looks daft and downright silly, and that’s exactly what that looked like. What’s worse is how quickly he bounced back and got the hot tag. I know it’s a common thin in pro wrestling, but it’s always annoyed me. Why is it that a superstar can barely walk or move, but less than a minute later they’re saving their partner and winning the match? To me it’s lazy booking. I’m not blaming the wrestlers, I’m blaming the bookers for not trying new things. It’s time to shake things up, make them different, really give a flying fig about what is going on in the ring and not just resting on the same formula that has been used for Tag Divisions for most of my life, and I’m over 45.

 

So Cute!

 

 

I love the relationship between Bliss and Nikki. They are adorable together, though I want to see Nikki become more and more sAniTy Nikki, because I want to see more of her crazy! Also, if you haven’t seen what Nikki said about shaving her hubby’s back on Twitter, you should check it out, because it was so sweet!

 

No More Dog Food!

 

 

I’m over these dog food recaps. I have a much weaker stomach than I used to. On the other hand, I love the direction that Corbin is going with his character. I honestly never thought he’d raise to the heights we’ve seen from him over the past year.

 

Eli Is Learning To Play!

 

 

It’s obvious that Elias has been learning to play the guitar more and more since he debuted on Raw with his guitar. He used to have two chords, but the opening he gave us to this segment was solid. I’m impressed with his growth on guitar, in the ring, and as a character. His comment about it being a miracle when he’s not interrupted showed that he’s willing to make light of himself and his character while still working hard at growing and evolving in all aspects of who he is as a superstar.

 

Walk With Eli!

 

 

I loved Elias’ double feet reversal of Cesaro’s reversal in the corner. The work between these two is fantastic! They have chemistry, which I say about Cesaro in almost every match. Between his charisma, insane strength, and ring work I still don’t understand why he’s not a singles competitor fighting for championships. Pulling Elias from the apron up over the top and to the mat was beautiful to watch, and I’ll admit I was shocked Elias kicked out of that and so many other big moves from Cesaro. Makes me wonder if they might have big plans for Elias going down the Road To WrestleMania.

 

Bow Down!

 

 

I truly didn’t think that Corbin had this in him when he was ‘brought up’ to the ‘main roster’ when he was. I love the double-standard that Reigns needs the Usos, but no mention of how Ziggler and Roode were out there to help him before the Usos, but that’s what a great heel can do without batting an eye. Though he sounds a bit Christian with the ‘one more match’ thing.

I wonder who the indie guys who worked with Corbin were. The one who took the water over his head might be short, but he has a great look and really showed some personality in this segment. He won me over more than Reigns, though I do like putting Corbin and Reigns in a cage.

 

Shine It Up, But It’s Still A Turd

 

 

 

I have an issue with Goldberg sitting on an exercise machine between two really expensive cars. If he tried to use that machine he’d dent and scratch those cars up to no end. I know what they were going for with this, but I was so distracted by the set that I couldn’t care much about what Goldberg was saying.

Now, I love grit and I love drama, but I have an issue with how this was handled. I know what they were after, but having Bray cut off Goldberg was too clean and too set-up. This wasn’t grit or drama, this is polishing a turd (whatever this next SA show is called) and trying to get people interested. Well, I think it’s horrible that any of the superstars feel like they have to go to SA and would love to see the whole roster boycott the trip. There’s just too much wrong with SA and if McMahon thinks that his contract for these shows have nothing to do with the direction of the WWE Stocks, he’s an absolute idiot. Then again, I think he was a money-grubbing idiot to get into that mess in the first place.

 

Slip Slater Away

 

 

I love Slater, but dang he needs to learn to shut his yap. Then again if it gets him in matches on TV, keep yapping! I also have to say that Slater looks huge compared to Bryan here. I know that Bryan isn’t big, but I always think of my Slater as slighter than he is. Though, as I said, I love the idea of Slater running his mouth and getting himself into matches that way. It’s a great direction for his character because, as he proved here, he’s great at rambling and sticking his foot in it. Honestly, I might love this character idea because I’m famous for inserting my foot into my mouth in a major way.

 

Not Quite Sure…

 

 

Where they are going with Bryan now. He’s just come back from being heel, and now what is he doing? As I said, I get this Slater character and hope they do more with it, but Bryan seemed strange here. He seemed edgy. Not like his character is edgy, but like his character is on edge in a way that could end really badly for him. I guess maybe they’re continuing his thing with The Fiend, as I would expect, but I’m still not sure about what they’re doing with Bryan in all this.

 

Finally!

 

 

I get why Renee was out there, but I just wanted to see Strowman talk. He’s so endearing whenever he is on mic. Renee looked great, but I just love Strowman. He really seems to wear his heart on his sleeve. The man we see on mic much of the time seems very like the man we see in clips and bits when he’s not playing Strowman for the camera. Also, his parents are adorable too.

Sami does have a growing stable, and I really like it. I’ve been screaming for factions and stables, and Sami leading Nakamura, Cesaro, and Revival looks great. Though it would look better if Revival were not asking for their release in a big way.

 

Tucky Ducky Quack Quack

 

 

I love a good montage, but playing Otis up as dumber than his character normally is bothers me. Yes, he’s chubby and bumbling, but he’s rarely as dumb as they made him out to be here. No need for Otis to be an idiot on top of everything else.

 

So Much For Crews!

 

 

I know that McMahon doesn’t see greatness in Crews, but that was ridiculous. Same for how Sheamus handled Shorty G. I get that they’re trying to book him as unstoppable, but he’s destroying strong superstars and making them look silly. It’s time Sheamus face someone his size. I guess what I’m saying is that I’m actually over Sheamus’ pushing around the little guys. It’s like Rowan, we can only see the same match over and over so many times before we want to change the channel, and (partially because of Rowan) I want to change the channel on Sheamus already.

 

Mella Is #1 Contender?

 

 

It was nice to see Bliss going all out in the ring the way she was, though I will say that Dana’s powerbomb on Bliss looked rather careful. Not saying it’s a bad thing as I like that they’re aware of the concussion issues Bliss has had recently and are watching out for it, just if I noticed, I’m not the only one. It was nice to see Dana being so safe, showing her power with Naomi, and really adding a lot to this match, not just being an afterthought. I know I seem to push Dana really hard, but I believe in her and think she could do so much more on the SD roster.

I’m sorry, but I’m going there on the ring gear again. Let me start by saying I still don’t like that outfit on Dana. I love her, but I don’t think that top works on her at all. I love Carmella’s ring gear from the Royal Rumble Match, it’s perfect on her and either taped or glued down well in that it doesn’t slide around on her bum, needing to be adjusted every move. Bliss’ ring gear seems to be fixed from the waistband issues she was having in the Royal Rumble Match. It’s Naomi’s ring gear that bothers me most here. She looks amazing in it, don’t think I’m saying it looks bad on her, because it doesn’t, but when she first adjusted after her entrance I knew there was going to be issues. Either the fabric is too thin, too stretchy, or both as it was moving on her body in ways it shouldn’t. When Bayley tried to grab Naomi by her gear she had to change her hold as the fabric moved and Naomi didn’t. Naomi’s tights were sticking out the back of her ring gear through much of the match and she was constantly pulling the front waist up. What I’m saying is that it’s a great look for her, but made in terrible fabric. I honestly would have given this match a better grade if I wasn’t so distracted by the ring gear issues in this match.

I really thought Naomi had this one. She’s exactly the woman needed to take the strap off Bayley, since they didn’t let Lacey save us from the boredom. Naomi more than deserves it, though I know WWE is still hoping for Sasha to be healthy enough to work soon. Personally I’d rather see Naomi take the strap off Bayley sooner than later and give us an amazing WM match against Lacey. I know it might not be the expected match, but a face versus face match like that could work. Or, bring Bianca over to work against Naomi at WrestleMania. There are so many directions they could go with a strapped Naomi while with Bayley they’re only banking on one match and personally I couldn’t care less about it!

 

Shut Up Graves, You’re A Tool

Sorry, I’m so over Graves on almost every level but much of his wardrobe. Though I will give him props for actually supporting his girlfriend and not lusting over Mandy. I know it’s McMahon telling him what to say and McMahon doesn’t think women should be anything but bikini models, so of course he’s going to be pushing his own feels for Mandy through Graves, but at this point, I’m beyond over it.

This was actually a pretty solid episode of SD, other than the couple of issues I trashed because they more than deserved it. I have to admit that this Road To WrestleMania has been pretty good so far. Fingers crossed that it continues and only gets better!

Queen