BUBBLY BOARDED! (An AEW All Out Review)

Hey, kids, it’s the Botching one with our review of AEW’s All Out PPV – held on Saturday night.  The card is stacked and I’m writing this as it goes along (except for the first match as I was late getting in).  Let’s get started, shall we?

 

Big Swole vs. Britt Baker

Loved seeing Swole pull up with all that attitude.  “Ya shoulda been ready!”  LOL!!  She is just dripping in “it”.  This match was largely a cinematic thing and I didn’t hate it.  Britt is really fun slime.  It really didn’t need commentary but Skeeavone, Ross, & Excalibur couldn’t help but talk.  Their dialog got in the way more often than not.  Britt’s leg fell asleep because of the syringe and I have died.  I caught this late and given how fast it went, I was sure I’d hate it.  I’m glad I don’t.  Nice work from both of them.  I wish I’d remained as happy.

 

Young Bucks vs. Jurassic Express

This one was just weird.  I didn’t like it or hate it; it was just kinda there.  The Bucks and Jurassic Express can go and they did here.  It just could have been so much more.  The Jurassic Express could have used the win, too so why didn’t they get it?  Odd outcome.

 

Casino Battle Royale

Oh, the Matt Sydal botch!  It was legendary.  He came out and the first move he made in AEW was a botch.  He slipped on the top turnbuckle and came down in a heap.  It didn’t look good so I hope he’s well.  The rest of this is what you think it’d be.  I did enjoy seeing Will Hobbs getting in there.  He even lasted a while and did some pretty cool things in there.  In truth though, these are never wrestling clinics and this wasn’t either.  Archer’s extensions get more and more ridiculous as time goes on.  While I was hoping Kingston would take it, I’m not surprised and he certainly wasn’t a bad choice.

 

Matt Hardy vs. Sammy Guevara (Broken Match)

This was just odd and, knowing what we know now, the progression of the match isn’t really anyone’s fault.  Matt’s head and neck made contact with the cement so they appeared to be stopping the match.  Then, it continued as he was cleared by the doc on the scene and Matt wanted to continue.  It ends with Sammy doing a trust fall (he certainly didn’t appear to be pushed) off the scaffold into the stage.  Lewis felt that “it was a skip moment as it’s terrible, but I feel that Matt legit hurt himself when they had the table moment and tried to stop it, quickly talked to Matt, he wanted to finish it and they skipped to the end.”  Either way, the result was expectedly bad.  The only thing that really matters here is that Matt is okay.  It’s hard to fathom the level of irresponsibility on display here.  Tony Khan and the doctor will definitely have some explaining to do going forward.  You can read more about it (here)

 

Hikaru Shida vs. Thunder Rosa

This match was built on absolutely nothing.  Still, the match itself wasn’t awful but it wasn’t good either.  It didn’t move particularly quickly and it didn’t captivate.  Thunder Rosa’s falcon arrow attempt just looked clumsy and it wasn’t the only thing that looked clumsy.  This was just sloppy from beginning to end.  They have zero chemistry.  The end.

 

Kip Sabian Wedding Announcement w/ Penelope Ford

They’re having a wedding on AEW Dynamite.  The Twitch channel troll was pathetic.  It might have been funny except they really needed to be concerned about their own PPV which was nearly tanking.  Like…focus there and don’t worry about the nonsense the other company is engaged in.  Just putting that out there.

 

Dark Order (Grayson, Uno, Cabana & Lee) vs. Matt Cardona, Scorpio Sky, QT Marshall, & Dustin Rhodes

Somewhat draggy match.  Scorpio had real spark – spark this entire PPV has been missing and Cardona kinda did too but beyond that, it just dragged.  I will say that the very end of this picked up nicely and it was fun to watch.  Not sure why the Cardona/Sky/Marshall/Rhodes team won.  Dank Odor needed a big win and this should have been it IMHO.  Oh well.  Still, this match at least had some life in it.  At the end of the match, Brodie was apoplectic and I loved that.  Nice bit of storytelling.  Brodie cannot handle losing.

 

Interview – Dustin Rhodes

This was interesting too.  Brodie vs. Dustin for the TNT title.  Should be a fun match.  Not mad at this at all.  Dustin is all passion a la Tommy Dreamer and I love to see it.

 

Kenny Omega & Hangman Adam Page vs. FTR

Things picked up here, thankfully.  FTR is so slavishly the Minnesota Wrecking Crew Mach II but they do it so well that I can’t be mad.  The presence of Tully there only heightens that comparison.  We couldn’t get the suffering from Page that we’d normally get from the MWC because times are different but what we did get was fun.   The back and forth here was really nice.  FTR is such slime and I love it.  Dax’s superplex was a thing of absolutely beauty.  The height he got!  Dag!  Really enjoyed the knee work or the “physical dissection” (JR’s term) of Omega.  It wouldn’t have worked as well if Omega didn’t sell so well but he really did.  Great chess match here and the outcome was the right one.  Even some fun storytelling afterwards.  The Elite are a bit of a mess.  Hangman is on his own too.  Who doesn’t love tatters?

 

Chris Jericho vs. Orange Cassidy

Really fun match that had some very nice back and forth.  It amazes me what Jericho is willing to do to make sure the talent he’s working with – in this case, Orange Cassidy, gets over.  Orange is absolutely NO slouch and he was so good throughout.  Of course, Jericho entered the drink and did so in dramatic fashion.  That overspill must have hit some of the audience.  Ridiculous stipulation but it worked here.  So there, Vince Russo!

 

Jon Moxley vs. MJH (ask Lewis)

MJH is just amazing.  He’s absolutely the best slime in all of pro wrestling.  Love the trolling of Mox by not going outside the ring with him.  Of course this was no DQ and Mox…um…had fun with that.  This was full of old-school storytelling and Mox being the incredible slime that he is.  Poor Wardlow.  He got up on the apron to interfere and thrown the AEW ring to MJH.  ‘Course, that just gave Mox the opportunity to hit the Paradigm Shift on MJH and it was over.  Really fun match all around with an outcome that was so richly deserved.

 

This was essentially a tale of two shows.  They started off well with Britt and Swole, then absolutely tanked for the next few matches and then it picked up again with the Tag title match and stayed there.  Again, there appeared to be two injuries here:  one involving Matt Sydal and the other more serious one involving Matt Hardy.  Matt absolutely has a concussion per Reby and I haven’t heard anything about Sydal.  He appeared to be okay and I truly hope that he is.

This was absolutely AEW’s worst PPV by a nautical mile and here’s hoping they pull it together from here on out.  I spent $50 on this one and I absolutely will think twice before I do so again.