Kayfabe-ing All Others (AEW Review)

Hey, kids!  It’s the Botching One…and you know what that means!  It’s time for another AEW blog!

 

Jurassic Express (Luchasaurus & Jungle Boy), Alex Reynolds & John Silver, Evil Uno & Stu Grayson, Chris Jericho & MJF, Sammy Hager (Sammy Guevara & Jake Hager), The Acclaimed (Max Caster & Anthony Bowens), Young Bucks (Nick & Matt Jackson), Top Flight (Darius & Dante Martin), Proud and Powerful (Santana & Ortiz)

I loved poor Isiah going into the air and finding an empty pool.  I laughed my fool head off.  Interesting that Darius Martin stayed in so much longer than his brother.  It does make sense though.  Honestly, Darius is the more interesting of the two by a pretty good distance.  Also, Nick Jackson was eliminated quickly too.  There was an interesting mix left three-quarters of the way through.  Max Caster, Jungle Boy, Sammy Guevara, MJF, Darius Martin, & Chris Jericho remained.  We ended up with Le Sex Gods and Darius at the very end.  Didn’t see that coming.  Darius got next.  He just does.  He acquitted himself so well here.  I was hoping he’d pull it out but sadly, it didn’t happen…and I get why.  Still, a really fun match.

As an aside, Tony Khan is crazy like a fox.  When Jungle Boy was one of the last six left, the crowd started singing his theme.  You love to see it.

 

Cinéma de Jade – Jade Cargill

Well, this is certainly reductive.  It’s like they’re beginning to position her as Bianca Belair from Raw or something.  Someone in AEW’s watching Raw.  The character has barely been presented and they’re already tweaking it.  More proof that when it comes to the women, they fly by the seat of their pants.  Oh well.  Let’s see where this goes.

 

In-ring segment…kinda – Darby Allin, Sting, Taz, Ricky Starks, Powerhouse Hobbs, & Brian Cage

I really like Darby.  He can literally just stand there and make you feel something.  That’s “it” and he’s got lots of it.  I’m glad AEW is really behind him.  This began promisingly…then Taz began to speak.  That never goes well.  Starks took over and he was so much better.  I keep saying it but who cares?  Starks can handle the talking.  Taz isn’t needed.  He was never needed.  He has BUCKETS of “it” and he’s confident on the mic.  Sting is a definite presence but he wasn’t great here either.  He stumbled a bit and it wasn’t great.  Still, this did move the story along a little more so I can’t hate.

 

Dr. Britt Baker vs. Thunder Rosa

Rosa does NOT take it easy on chops.  YIKES!  She was doing some kind of sick WALTER impersonation. This wasn’t anything amazing because Britt isn’t.  Little she does looks good.  To be frank, even Rosa wasn’t at her best here.  She wasn’t terrible by any means but we know how good she really is…and we didn’t quite get that here.  That’s likely because she was trying to make it all work with Britt.  There were just uncomfortable pauses, clumsy counters, and other oddness that dotted the match.  I will say that Britt’s Air Raid Crash looked really impactful.  Just wish everything else had.  Excalibur claimed Britt was having trouble getting the glove and she quite clearly wasn’t.  She put it on quite easily.  LOL!  I also love how easily Reba/Rebel got that turnbuckle off.  It was like it was taped on or something.  Just…LOL!!  The ending was fun with solid heel work.

 

Backstage segment – Matt Hardy & Adam Page

You snake, Matt…LOL!  He’s going after Page.  He’s slowly getting him too.  This could be really fun.

 

“Hangman” Adam Page & Matt Hardy vs. Chaos Project (Luther & Serpentico)

These two teams worked really well together.  Serpentico sold Page’s damage quite well too.  Gotta love a good Buckshot Lariat.  The story told here was fun too.  Matt tagged himself in off of Page’s finisher so that he could get the pin.  I’m still waiting to are about Luther and Serpentico.  Serpentico works well in the ring but I barely care.  Luther is another one I just don’t care about yet.  This match was really much more about the story between Matt and Adam than the match itself.  Still, it was a quick and fairly enjoyable match.

 

Backstage segment – Chris Jericho, MJF, Sammy Guevara, Jake Hager, Proud and Powerful (Santana & Ortiz)

MJF looks to be taking apart the Inner Circle from the inside…and I likes!

 

Backstage segment – Kip Sabian, Miro, Charles Taylor, & Vicki Guerrero

Short but sweet.  They sold their excitement for the wedding.

 

The Wedding – Father James Mitchell, Kip Sabian, Miro, Charles Taylor, Vicki Guerrero, Penelope Ford, Jerry Lynn, & Orange Cassidy

Jerry cleans up well!  Tony Schiavone is a whole fool.  He dropped one-liners through the whole thing.  The snark was real and I am here for all of it.  Penelope really does make a really lovely bride.  The set was just…

Oh knock it off!  Who doesn’t love a good wrestling wedding?  Why are you such a stick in the mud!  You liked it.  You know you did!  If you didn’t, you hate fun and you need therapy.  It’s all entertainment…and you were entertained!  Don’t make me come over there!  Geez…

James Mitchell was equally high-larious.  “Dashing rapscallion”.  I cannot!  “To have and to grope”.  Think of the children!!!!  This was actually really fun.  I love that the audience broke out into the Haddaway song.  Miro got a little caught off guard by it at first but he went with it.  Of course, this went horribly wrong.  Handcuffing Miro was a nice touch.  Penelope’s didn’t get nearly enough cake on it.  That would have “upped” the comedic value.

All told, it was fun for what it was.

 

NBA – Shaq and them

Shaq’s treating this like a joke.  He won’t allow us to take this seriously.  As such, I have no reason to care…and I absolutely don’t.

 

Eddie Kingston vs. Lance Archer (Lumberjack Match)

This was as you think it’d be.  I hate that Jake got involved.  He is too ill to be doing anything other than standing there.  I dearly loved Lance’s Blackout.  Of course, everyone on the outside got involved. Bear Country was really fun!  Peter Avalon makes a really fun punching bag.  Kingston sells like a beast.  Archer sells well too.  Lance does the “I hate that he’s getting away with this”-kind of selling and it works for him.

 

FTR (Dax Harwood & Cash Wheeler) & Tully Blanchard

Tully is the rare talent that has lost absolutely nothing despite his advanced age.  He menaces every bit as well as he did thirty years ago…maybe even better.  Poor Marko.  He made a great prisoner there.  Short but really fun segment.  FTR is now becoming a monster heel team and I love it.

 

Kenny Omega & The Good Brothers (Doc Gallows & Karl Anderson) vs. Pac, Rey Fenix, & Jon Moxley

The timing of the commercial break though!  How odd!  Callis started to speak and…black.  Okay, the match.  Pac & Karl Anderson were fun together.  Great speed between both of them.  Pac take damage really well.  I always look for that.  Of course, we know Mox does.  I’m not sure anyone sells better than him other than maybe Dolph Ziggler.  Fenix is just electricity personified.  The speed!  I loved the stereo moonsaults from Fenix & Pac.  That dragon suplex onto Fenix just looked vicious!  These guys just put their bodies on the line.  Pac’s ribs must be KILLING him now.

KENTA!  Like…what???  The cooperation we’re getting now between Impact, NJPW, and AEW is really fun.  It’s nothing we’ve ever seen before and it really opens the floodgates on who can be used and where we see them.  I love this!!!